That’s exactly how you make me feel.
I don’t think you realize a lot of things. For one, you’ve changed completely as a person. The innocence you exuded at the beginning disappeared so quickly, as if all of that was just a front for people to like you. The very fundamental morals you stood so strongly about and judged others on have been crushed by your very own feet. Almost everything about you says “hypocrite” now, and your actions can no longer be trusted.
As disheartening it is to see the person who you’ve become or maybe the person you’ve been all this time, the one thing you fail to realize over and over again is that what you’re doing is not okay by any means. You keep on making excuses and reasons for it, always claiming nothing is happening or “will happen” or that it’s all him initiating everything. That doesn’t make what you’re doing acceptable. You will never admit that you’re wrong when you clearly are. Simply put, you’re a horrible person. Terrible person. You’re a homewrecker. I don’t know what it’ll take for you to see that. Yes, maybe a lot of it has to deal with the fact that you have zero experience in this field and have no idea what you’re getting yourself involved in, but that doesn’t make anything you’re doing okay.
Realizing all of this, I know it’s best that as a friend or even so, a good friend, I should talk to you because I care about you. However, you leave me at a very uncomfortable position where I just feel helpless. Why? Because no matter what is said to you, you will never listen. I keep giving you the benefit of the doubt, thinking that you’re better than all of this. That you will eventually realize what I realize. That you are way more considerate of a person to do such a thing. But no, every time, you disappoint me more and more to the point where I don’t even know what to do anymore. Yes, none of this is my business at all and I shouldn’t get involved. But how can I just sit there, watching all of this happen and pretend that it doesn’t bother me at all.
You’re smart to be so secretive about it or else your reputation would be shot, but you would be surprised at the things people see.